I love this person

3 Entertainment essentials

Though sadly no penguins involved.

It's as good as watching paint dry!

Better than bBig Brother 73 anyway

Penguins and stuff

odintomadness and all other related sites are now penguin populated zones with special areas to say how great they are, we are even going to adopt a penguin. we run purely on penguin urine as well.

How sunday morning of me!

Hangover information, symptoms, and prevention

If we ignore the fact it's 1pm. I'm still hungover anyway.

I'm a journalist. or something...

I've been finding out if I'm insane or not all morning.

You should check too

After all, you are reading this.

Five Scallies get me Excited

It's the new girls aloud single!

It probably won't be able to beat "Sound of the Underground" or "No Good Advice," but I wanna hear it! It'll have to beat "jump", that was a pathetic attempt at pop.

Big Masturbation Poll

how dirty are you?

This is a rather good poll, lots of people, lots o questions huzzah, you get to see if you're normal or if you're a fuckin sick bastard who should be locked up. BUT, just beacuse it says '22.07% have masturbated over a family member' this DOES NOT make it right...on the whole.

Clean and Cute

Pre-baby stage soap

you asked for it, maybe, and now you've got it, it's: FETO SOAP, soap with fetos in it, enjoy it, for it's all you're getting until bedtime

hmmm

Only the Danes would do this

How to avoid hell

Handy (but maybe pedantic) reasons why never to play chess with death.

Cultured art safe for kiddies eyes

Have you ever been worried that this classical art was lovely, but there was too much nakedness? No, I haven't either.

But anyway, for those who were....

Next time send money

The Proving that not just the police, fire, and health services have corrupt staff.

Cyber Sex...

Porn For Computers

I just don't understand this, we have everything you could want in the from of porn on this world wide web and we will soon do a run-down of our favourite types of porn in a special list, yet people would choose AND PAY for non-real porn... I have linked this before off JoeandJames but I feel those who pissed out deserve an extra chance.

Sex in a Can and Surreal Antiques

Pink Lady Sex in a Can.
Brings the meaning of novelty to a whole new level.

Fancyteeth is wonderful

And something to do in general studies exams.

Comic Strip But Serious

Licenses Explained | Creative Commons

just what the fuck?

Wow

Convict to Professor: All These Jobs....

Probably one the longest (and most varied) list of jobs anyone will have ever done. ever.

Don't They Sound Funny

Cheap Laugh

The story is actually quite serious, involves people who didn't get compensation due to some loop-hole, blah blah, but the first word is 'Fukuoka', it's a place that sounds like one of our swear words, ha.

Madonna Death

Madonna To Be Killed By Mean People

Firstly, she goes to Israel and become shocked by terrorism being apparent there.
Secondly, she was 'freaked out' because they know about her kids, which must frankly be very odd considering she takes them to photo shoots, announced their births through her pr agent and they regularly appearin papers, and on this site.
Thirdly, despite being investigated, we strenously deny all allegations stating that odintomadness owners, Ric and Joe have anything to do with these death threats...

LAst post of this morning, honest...

But why did Jordan go onto top gear in her pajamas?

If you missed it... go on a picture hunt.... I'll try and find one though..

Obsessive penguin disorder continues

Pengor: Penguin of Doom

They're in danger of overtaking kittens as the coolest mammal.

Probably the best sentence in the world

Whats Wrong with the Music Industry in One Long Sentence

Never let a 12 year old near a zoo

They start wanting albino rats as impulse buys.

My folly into advertising continues

Found this gratuitously bad one from ages ago too

Woo and yey for stereotyping

B3ta have only been running a "take the piss out of farmers" competition for a day but the results are already genius.

Perfect timing here

Another classic

Madonna wants to shock you. again.

This time's she's attempting to be epic!

With breaking down into tears, a token political message, a parade of nearly naked pregnant women, and yes, more gratuitous lesbianism.

Sounds er... yea.. anyone gonna pay 40 quid for that?

P.S. We want more Nick Owen blogs

The best biscuit review in the world

"I guess we should all just be thankful that they have stopped pretending to play saxophones whilst jumping through japanese people's walls"

It's a classic biscuit too.

I'm going into advertising!

Here's my first attempt

The joys of lists

some top fives to cure my boredom

Top Five NY Bands:
1. Velvet undergorund
2. Interpol
3. Moldy Peaches/Adam Green
4. The Ramones
5. New York Dolls

Top Five BBC Shows:
1. MOTD
2. Later
3. Anything With John Peel
4. Most stuff with Lamacq
5. Hustle

Top Five Evertone Players of the '90s:
1. Duncan Ferguson
2. Andrei Kanchelskis
3. Neville Southall
4. Barry Horne
5. Anders Limpar

Top Five Insults Which Descend Into A Pit Of Hate:
1. 'You should have been drowned at birth and then just to make sure they should have poked you with knitting needles whilst the whole ward laughed and pointed at you for being so shit'
2. 'I found your mother on a street corner and so I went and slept with her. When I was supposed to pay her I said what? PAY YOU? do you have no respect you horrible bitch and then made her cry by reminding her that she was letting down her kids and now I'm telling you, your mother is a whore. fact.'
3. 'What's that? You can't walk? Well is it a surprise when you're so fucking stupid that you just LET a 4x4 run you over at 120 miles an hour, why didn't you get out of the way? who gives a fuck if you were saving your pregnant wife? you can't walk and now your kid has a shit father'
4. 'You have aids? oh well look at this...'(proceed to cough onto them) 'ya see to me that's just annoying to you it's fatal, how odd'
5. 'Alright...'

As sexually active as Janet Jackson

Britney meets Rocky Horror Show meets crazy sex whore

Though crazy sex whore's tres Rocky Horror Show anyway. Bring on the time warp.

"she is looking for a man who isn't politically correct and isn't everybody's darling"

It's still not a good enough excuse for fucking Fred Durst.

Those crazy death metallers...

The most insane band history in the world

Highlights include the bass player stabbing the guitarist to death as he was jealous of his "more evil" reputation.

Test

This is a test of the new comments system. International Rescue may, or may not have to be called in.

I've been headbutted in the arm repeatedly

Franz Ferdinand are making attempts to be as rock and roll as the Libertines

Though the Libertines would have probably mugged him as well.

Fred Durst's words of the week!

"i guess life is fun when you're fat and bald. it is for me"

-Fred Durst is an active sponser of ODintomadness, having once said "thank you so much for being you." Just not to us.-

Accidents can be good

http://odintomadness.blogpot.com/

It's great that people can link bible studies sites to descending into madness.

But remember kids

"I know that there is none other name under heaven given among men whereby we MUST be saved (EXCEPT JESUS)"

FEAR OUR EXCESSIVE USE OF CAPS LOCK. WE SHALL COME AND DESTROY. DESTROY!

The last sentence may have been edited.

These people are great.

Misheard Lyrics for Radiohead

My favourites are:

"This is what you get when you miss the bus"

"Red wine and sleeping pills
Never get past the nuns."

"Elvis' children... Elvis' children yea.."

Interesting Film Fact No.1

The Last Samurai is the only known film to include a scene of erotic putting-on of clothes. (Ignoring any dodgy films involving men wearing ladies clothing)

Now for you to become useful

I need a job. I am very poor, I currently have 27p and a ticket to Othello at the Lowry, that is me, that is what I am. So therefore I have taken the slightly disturbing step and started looking for a job, if you know of any or are indeed a job and what me to work in you, the contact me...now. Otherwise I'll...destroy all my websites...maybe...if it wasn't all that made me feel worthwile

This is the news

Avril's excuse for not having a boyfriend(scroll down)

Although I think it's probably more to do with the fact that she looks like an alien.

Victoria Beckham's been edited out of an album she co-wrote

She'll settle down as a rich washed-up housewife eventually.

Two maniacs take Edward Monkton one step too far

Just so they stop pestering us in the chat box and start using it for what it was originally designed for, bad jokes about sex and barbie dolls.

Ric will be doing his hair

Ric will be changing hair colour soon, I have it on good authority and we will force him to do it. In related news, he will be wearing the previously mentioned naval uniform and he will look dapper, yay for ric.
and........the new joeandjames forum
I'll just pretend you weren't going on it because it wasn't linked...

Banned drinks list

1. Smirnoff Ice
2. Baileys Glide
3. Non-alcaholic beer

They are all so unhardcore it's goddam pathetic.

Anyone who ever decides to ask for these drinks at a bar should, and probably will, be slapped.

I may be blonde but

Why is this a shock?

If they weren't fucked outta their faces.... now that'd be headlining along with The Libertines not trying to cause mass rioting at a gig.

In some other good news Kelly Osbourne's given up on boys

"Boys are annoying."

She poetically said.

as the evening falls i slowly become a shadow within a shadow

Fred Durst's Blog

Apparently. I want to know what yoga/buddhism/psycho maniac course he's been on. The polyphonic spree had kidnapped him and just sung to him for hours. He couldnt speak at first and only uttered ramblings something about "the sun, the beautiful sun.. the sun.." for days.

Domestic Bleach is not a Hair Product

Top 5 Most Disturbing Male Hair Attributes

5. Foot Hair
4. Pony Tail(s)
3. Sideburns
2. Moustache
1. Nose Hair

Combine more than one for best effect

Top 5 Coolest Male Hair Attributes.

5. Dreads
4. Baldness*
3. Metal Hair**
2. Big Whispy Beards***
1. Blonde Highlights

* Really only works if you're black, aisian, or Richard O'Brian. Bald white guys usually just don't look cool.
** Must be 3 feet long, minimum. Preferably washed too. No-one likes grease.
***eg Gandalf and that Guy From Kill Bill