This is a local blog

Awful catchphrase references aside, why not get truly excited about the new League Of Gentlemen Film by watching this teaser. Lovely. I'm gonna get me one of them Rosyton Vasey road signs while I'm at it

Dead Journal Fun

The random button leads to some crazy people...

new year res - 1 and only, i must know someone 12 hours in person before i sleep with them.

Good for her, it's great that people still have standards in the 21st century.

I thought QC was joking...

But no, for gothic blogger, you can get yourself a DeadJournal, for those who think livejournal isn't black enough for their soul. Or something.

The Jazz Society's Thursday E-mail

I might make this a regular feature, I've never been to one of the events, I just love the e-mails:


Hmmmmmmm......

first close your eyes... (you'll have to get someone to read the next part of the email, so you can keep your eyes closed)

now...
breath in,
breath out,

breath in,
breath out.

relax, and imagine yourself in a peaceful place, where the little birdies are sitting at the tops of the little trees, tweeting to the sound of your heartbeat.

the waves slowly roll up the beach, licking your toes as you relax and catch the fading moment of the evening sun.

you are so happy, all you want is a glass of iced water to cool you down slightly.
It's bliss.

now you're in the correct mood, you can open your eyes and read the rest of the jazzsoc email!!!!!!!!

TONIGHT ---- THE BLUE NOTE JAM!!!

That's right guys, the blue note era is coming your way. Kenny Burrell, Monk, Miles, with a bit of Jimmy Smith on the side. (I'm not sure Jimmy would be that happy about that, but that's the way it is).

So if you fancy da blues, or da hard bop we will give it to you, and even more if you ask - tonight in The City Tavern on Market Street.

The house band:

TOM 'HI I'M TOM' HEWSON - PIANO (Band leader)
MARCO 'HI I LIKE TOM, HE IS COOL' NIEVERGELT - BASS
STEVE 'I'M TOM'S FRIEND FROM HOME' BRIDGLAND - GUITAR (All the way from Canterbury)
MR. 'I HATE TOM, HE SMELL'S OF POO' DRUMMER - DRUMS

COOL!

Well I can't wait, I've waxed my legs specially for the occasion - I'm hoping that the decreased wind resistance will mean that I can run quicker, and then get there earlier! WICKED!

So we'll be seeing you,
tonight at THE CITY TAVERN ON MARKET STREET
STARTING AT 8PM
ENTRY IS £1

and I want to see everyone's legs nicely waxed,
The Committee xx

Double Dropping is Rarely Mint Based

This week google will mostly be redirecting peadofiles to the site, with us coming up on the first page for "jordie chandler picture". Bugger. The worst part is the text google uses:

"... tells how Jackson would kiss 13-year-old Jordie Chandler and perform ... Multimap have
upgraded their site with aerial photos, so it makes ... And better pictures... ... "

On the bright side, at the rate this is going, we can just make the entire blog based on posts about what kind of searches find us.

It's just a phase I'm going through...

...but hey I really love you, I really love you, I really love you.

So there.

If you steal my butter again I'll lace it with cyanide

ORBVS the webcomic!

I haven't read much of it, but it talks about both the Smiths, and Men Without Hats within the space of the first 3 strips. Which must be good.

The Men Without Hats website is amazing, including classy things like the guitar tabs for the safety dance. It's also got a dicography with this list of amazing covers:

The Safety Dance, covered by Bang Bang on Bang Bang: Nur Wir Zwei (The Safety Dance in German)

The Safety Dance, covered by The Echoing Green

The Safety Dance, covered by Jaymz Bee and the Royal Jelly Orchestra on Jaymz Bee and the Royal Jelly Orchestra: Cocktail - Shakin' And Stirred

The Safety Dance, covered by Luxt

The Safety Dance, covered by Status Quo on Status Quo: Don't Stop

The Safety Dance, covered (sort of) by "Weird Al" Yankovic

The Safety Dance, covered (sort of) by Big Daddy

The Safety Dance (Parody version sung basically to the tune of "The Twist")

Where Do The Boys Go? (Covered by a College A Capella group)

Unusual Livejournal

Wanking Journal

ODintomadness are not responsible for the content of any of their links, and are definately not responsible near flammable objects.

Just to pass the time

before we get our own line of clothing you should buy this stuff because it's like sticking it to the man and will make you 'alternative'

Google Search: false monobrows

For some reason we're number 2...

It might be crap but...

do Dick and Dom deserve to be discussed in Parliament? I think Mr. Luff needs to grow up and stop being a fucking twat, personally.

More Yey

This has been on the Eels website for a few days, but unlike most other blogs, we're not complacent enough to expect you to be able to read.

1/14/2005- BLINKING LIGHTS AND OTHER REVELATIONS:
The new EELS album BLINKING LIGHTS AND OTHER REVELATIONS will be released April 26, 2005, worldwide. It is now confirmed to be a 33 track DOUBLE album. Stay tuned for more updates.

.

Yey

I think they might be taking the piss, dear

The Ringtones Society aims to liberate the world of ridiculous ringtones by inviting musicians to join us and donate their self-composed ringtones to the cause.

My New Favourite Love Song

I miss you more than Michael Bay missed the mark, When he made Pearl Harbor.
I miss you more then that movie missed the point, And that's an awful lot girl.
And now, now you've gone away, And all I'm trying to say, Is Pearl Harbor sucked and I miss you.

Really though, Trey Parker and Matt Stone should be kept in isolation from xenophobic jokes and musical instuments at all times.

Guessing Time

Can anyone guess my new favourite song title? go on I dares ya

Still Pretending Fightstar is a New Band

Busted have split!

I don't know how I'm going to cope.

More New Album Goings-On

Here's stuff about the new Elbow album. Which is going to be brilliant, because it just will be, lovely.
And while we're at it, last night they announced the best Scottish bands ever which Belle and Sebastian won. Good, for they are great. However the rest of the list is not so good, in fact it bites serious turd. So, it should have read:
1. Belle & Sebastian
2. Teenage Fanclub
3. Jesus & Mary Chain
4. Primal Scream
5. The Blue Nile, maybe, dunno
Anyway, why Travis? And aren't Snow Patrol Northern Irish really? Just fuck off Proclaimers and Mogwai are a bit over-rated but shh, I didn't say that did I?
Oh and hurray for 6Music even more than usual for they've put a pool on over Doherty's 'cool status' and 82% said it was silly. Good.

I Like This, Be Nice To These People

Here we have a good site, which I like, something to do with Warwick and Writing but there isn't much evidence for it but it did lead me to this which grows slightly boring after a while but is diverting for a short time.
Whilst you are pottering about go and find a penny farthing with guns on, they're rather fun.

Can You Guess...

who is in this band this is. It's a desperate attempt to grab credibility by him. And they're supporting Taking Back Sunday and YCNI:M, I do hope fans of these bands hate them now.

Spinal Tap Fun

Amazon are now selling love pumps which is nice, because I want one.
And when you get bored play this it's been keeping me amused.
In other news, Me and Ric got lost on a walk but still had a jolly time, we also did the filtering thing.

Homoerotic Fanfiction with Bryan Adams

Top Ten Most Disturbing Band Fan Fiction Stories

You have to sign up to a site to read them, but it's worth 3 minutes doing it. As long as you don't mind being disturbed for life.

Helping disabled songwriters

Guitar tuning for blondes

-No.1

E
B
E
G
B
E

-No.2

E
B
E
G#
B
E

------

They're also useful for people with only one finger on their left hand. We're that considerate.

.

"There's two kinds of people: those that understand that Electro Shock Blues is the greatest album ever put together, and idiots."
Dom Passantino, Stylus Magazine

I don't know how much I can argue with that.

N.B. This will be the first of 5672 Eels obsessive posts in the run up to the release of an album we know practically nothing about.

Because the makeup in Charlie's Angels worked so well...

Video Summary:

-Man sings to mother rat
-Women are strangely attracted to mother rat
-Rats start appearing from breasts
-Old men have a punch-up

I don't know what's going on, but there's an accordian and the song is lovely.

By the way, has anyone got a Brita Filter?

Poor Robbie

Well, more like poor Queen.

"I'd have killed for a chance to sing with those guys backing me,"

I'd have killed if he had a chance to sing with those guys backing him, too.

We steal funny stories for your benefit

Here's one from Holy Moly which has made me cum with laughter:
When the Black Crowes and Lenny Kravitz toured together through the States, Kravitz was being a cock. He would soundcheck for 4 hours a day, trying to perfect his 'Hendrix-In-Remission' schtick, leaving the Crowes with no time at all.

So the Crowes deliberately over-ran every night meaning everyone's favourite boil-in-the-bag 'rocker' would go into curfew time, racking up huge fines every night.

The backbiting and slagging carried on for most of the tour until finally Kravitz went into the Crowes' tour manager's office and told him to stop...

...with the immortal line, "At the end of the day, I'm a nigger from the hood and I'll shoot him". Cue much sniggering from the Crowes camp, more onstage abuse and the end of the tour.
I've always had a soft spot for Black Crowes.

Spank The Celeb

Final proof that people are weird on the internet. I don't think it's sexual, as we don't like to get smutty here, we've got standards.According to an article on an internet website, brought to SF&R`s attention by a site visitor, the American singer played along humorously when a Hollywood shopkeeper said he was going to spank her for causing noise and disruption in his shop. My favourite quote from a website we've featured ever.

Festive 50 comments

Peel's Festive 50 went out as usual this year with it being no surprise that The 'Mighty' Fall were #1 and we wouldn't want ti any other way. Anyway, just thought you might like to see it, and if you're foreign and reading this, listen to it and find out what a decent radio show should play. And because it's Peel and people who liked him, we'll even overlook number 9.

I woke up at 4am today

I was noseying round the Eels website (after someone mentioned musicians with immense beards) when I found this news post:

12/4/2004- MOTHER OF ALL EELS ALBUMS:
There are rumors floating around that the EELS' forthcoming album will be an epic, 33 track, DOUBLE album. These rumors are unsubstantiated at this time. We'll keep you posted when we know more.

Also E releases a new album every 2 years-ish, and Shootenanny! was in 2003.... could 2005's list of exciting stuff get any more exciting? So far:

Doves
IamKloot
Mercury Rev
Athlete
Alfie

Are all promising to give us new stuff. Yey for stuff!

Listomania from by Brain-ia

I am deeply and tragically bored as of about now so I have decided to write a list in no particular order and with no structure of stuff that happened in 2004 which I liked or hated, rightio then, Self-indulgent blogging ahoy:
1. This marvellous website
2. Questionable Content and Forums
3. Mozza
4. You Shall Know Our Velocity
5. Rooney
6. Rooney saying bye bye
7. Everton rocking because of it
8. John Peel
9. Right-wing blogs and sites
10. Getting mean letters from them
11. The Malts
12. Losing shoes
13. Brian Clough
14. "I'm not drunk, I just hate emo kids"
15. "The last time I saw you two together, you were trying to take over the world."
16. Snow and Golf Course
17. Stealing of our clothes followed by Max going, 'Is this a tramp's coat?" No, it was mine.
18. Leeds Festival - Ste's trip, Max out of it, Glc screwing up SFA but Man Don't Give A Fuck still being wonderful, Supergrass doing an acoustic Caught By The Fuzz - why? Morrissey - naked man, cider and cigs
19. Pete Doherty - ?
20. Michael Moore finally being outed as a tit.
Maybe some more when I'm bored later

Taking Ric the opposite way home, fun

How was New Years for everyone? In mine I flew to Greece and met up with a group of commandos who planned on taking over the world. We had a chat and a coffee and decided not to. That was jolly.

Disney you fuckwits

Ending the cartoon version of Robin Hood, where all the characters are played by animals, with the line "and that's how it really happened," is probably another reason for the rise of children needing therapy in UK and the States. Either that, or the increase of people on LSD.